so that big change that happened last week? the one that i felt like discussing … and yet wasn't sure if i should? i feel like i need to put a few thoughts out there … and then i can start letting it go. i started this layout before last week … before the change. funny how it totally changed the direction of what i did with it.
on a scrapbooking note … this is another layout i did using some of the fun products from dude designs. the pattern papers, the journaling block, and the little heart sticker. so cute! i also added a heidi swapp heart. and then everything else is making memories … the letters, the paint, the glitter paint, the grommets, the chipboard button, the felt ribbon, the clip. love all their stuff!
so anyways. i had 2 of my daycare girlies leave me last week. 2 girlies that have been here for 3 years. totally out of nowhere. at least to me … i had no clue. now, i've had plenty of kids leave me over the past 6 years … for lots of different reasons. moving, advancing, going to preschool, change of parent's situations, etc. but i'll admit that this one doesn't sit well with me. it doesn't add up. and it makes me sad.
in the end, after a talk and a few emails … i was told that my blog basically brought this change on. that my blog posts from the past month or so started this whole thing. that my blog posts have been "unprofessional" and "alone warrant our action". let's see. this is my personal blog … not my professional blog. funny how when i'm posting all those cute pics i take of the kids … and sharing all the layouts i do with those pics with all the touching journaling … and writing good things about them … it's all good.
but when i choose to vent about my job from time to time … now it's a problem? i like to vent quite honestly. anyone who knows me should know that. not everyone loves their job all the time. and i've always made a point to say how i love the kids to death. but the job is the job … and it's not all flowers and sunshine. i know that anytime i do vent, or complain, about my job … it's very general. i don't sit here and name names … or single anyone out … or name any certain situations. i think my complaints are just general stuff that i deal with all the time. ask anyone who does daycare (or teachers too). it's a hard, tiring, thankless, annoying job for the most part. but the kids make it worth it in the long run … otherwise i don't think we'd still be doing these jobs. but that certainly doesn't mean i don't have gripes. and putting my gripes down in a nice little vent session usually makes me feel a little better.
i got a really nice email last week. this person had just found my blog and was reading it for the first time. she took the time to email me though. she said that she could appreciate that i was a "tell it like it is person". which i had to laugh a little … because i'm only like that in writing and never face to face. lol! but she said that even though i have plenty in my life to complain about (with all the health stuff mainly) … that i do it with humor and in a light-hearted way. and i love that she "got me" … just from what little of my blog she read that day. i'm a very sarcastic person. and i love to complain. but when i do … i don't think it's ever meant to be taken too seriously.
i would like to think that most of my friends "get me". that they understand how i am. that i would never intentionally try and hurt someone's feelings by something i posted. i would like to think that those that have known me for years wouldn't necessarily hold a few weeks against me. i would think that my friends would know that no matter what i'm venting about … that i'm still the same person i've always been. i am still the same "laura" to these kids that i've always been … that is one thing that i can swear has never changed. even on my most stressful, feel awful days … i'm still great with these kids. and if someone can't see that … than too bad for them.
so i am truly sorry if anything i ever posted at any time on this blog has ever offended someone or hurt someone. but i'm not going to stop. i'm not going to censor my life and only talk about all the happy-go-lucky days that i have. i will continue to post about whatever is on my mind. because believe me … i spend an entire evening last week reading through months and months of my blog posts. and i really didn't see anything that would cause such great concern. i've been blogging now for 2 1/2 years. and i can say that for any "venting post" that you may find … you will find about 10 "happy, loving" posts about this job and my life too.
the sad part of all this is the girlies. we will miss them. more than i can even say. i'm so sorry it had to come down to something like this. my guess is that there is more to this. there has to be something else. but i'll never know. so things changed … and we'll deal with it. i may not understand it … but i'll deal with it. as much as i would do anything for the girls … i'm letting it go. there are some things that aren't worth fighting … and this drama is one of those things.
edited to add (because you know i always re-read my posts about 30 times and eventually feel the need to add something. lol!): i want to make it clear that i do respect the decision that was made. parents have to do what they feel is right for their family. and needing to be comfortable with where their kids spend their time is extremely important. so i respect that. i don't, however, understand it … because nothing here has changed. and i think it's only natural to want to understand things that effect our lives and those around us.
Laura Vegas 
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